PEN15 and The Toll of Asian American Success

      In PEN15, Maya and Anna play middle schoolers, even though they're in their 30s in real life, and uncomfortably forces the audience to relive their middle school experiences, in some way, shape, or form. While although my experience was not entirely like the show's portrayal (eg. saying slut or bitch every few sentences, drinking alcohol, etc), I could definitely relate to Maya getting a "bowl cut" and being bullied at school for it. Even though I wasn't called a "UGIS" in middle school, it was very obvious that people considered me to be one. School dances were unfortunately the highlight of those "UGIS" moments, especially when boys had to pick a girl to dance with (ew). 

    While I was watching the show, I was quite confused as to what my takeaways/observations of the show should be. I was able to take note of the subtle discrimination that Maya had to experience, like that mother who saw the Japanese beer can and immediately accused Maya of drinking it. Other than that, the purpose of the show was unclear to me. Even though the show incorporated some interactions between Maya and her mother (in Japanese), there wasn't much in terms of Asian American representation, in my honest opinion. I think the fact that it's a cringe comedy possibly takes away from any chances of reinventing Asian American representation. The cringe factor was the biggest takeaway for me, and so I was unable to completely focus on whether or not the show did a good job at including Asian American culture. 

    In the reading "We Will Not Be Used", there were quite a few notes that I really appreciated. The central topic of the reading was based on success that Asian Americans are perceived to achieve immediately, completely disregarding those who do not fall under that category (eg. work over time, know no leisure time, etc.) Hardships and racism experienced by Asian Americans are miraculously "erased" due to the popular belief that they're able to gain success/are already successful. While although some Asian Americans are able to reach their peak of success, they are still underrepresented in their successful positions. Towards the end of the reading, displaced anger is discussed. Due to their continuous marginalization, things such as homophobia occur due to the fear of being further marginalized. Instead of placing anger on white racism, Asian Americans "displace" their anger onto other Asians, fueling the continuous race towards success.